Before She Was Famous
by Sexual Womble
Summary: Rachel Berry got the career she always dreamed of, but how did she get there? Rachel reflects on the events and people that made her the woman she is today. Eventual Faberry.
1. Chapter 1

**BEFORE SHE WAS FAMOUS**

I'm a totally Faberry geek, in a slightly obsessive way. So this will be a Faberry story. Eventually. This is also the biggest piece of writing i've took on in a long time and i'd appreciate any feedback i can get. Thanks mucho!

**Chapter One**

Rachel Berry became everything she ever said she would be. It should not have surprised any of the people back in Ohio, it certainly hadn't shocked Mr Schue and her old glee club members. Her fathers told every person they met that they had always known their little girl was destined for greatness. The only person from Rachel's whole life that still couldn't believe she got to be the big star, with her name up in lights, movies, book deals and enough awards to constitute being called an industry legend was Rachel herself. She still woke up in her New York penthouse apartment every morning thinking she was that bright eyed eighteen year old, heading for the adventure of a lifetime to the big city.

That had been almost forty years ago. Forty years of glitz and glamour, parties, award ceremonies, fighting for roles in the beginning of her career, changing the way the industry viewed what was considered beautiful, changing the way little girls thought about themselves and what they could achieve if they just dreamed big enough. It was everything she had ever wanted in her life. Yet here she sat, in a tiny studio with just a camera in front of her and an interviewer to her right and she was possibly the most nervous she had ever been in her career. Because what she was about to do was so much more than she had ever dreamed of doing, so much more than she ever thought her life could be and so much more important than any of the roles or awards or parties. This was her life she was giving up to the world, the life she had always held so close to herself and never let the public in to. She was offering up her heart and soul at the age of fifty seven and she was terrified. She was the little girl about to go out on her own singing "Don't Rain On My Parade" on a wing and a prayer. Only multiplied by a thousand.

The journalist looked over at her with a small smile and asked if she was ready to start, sensing Rachel's nervousness and trying to put her at ease. Inhale, hold, hold, exhale.

"Yeah. Yes, Definitely." The interviewer motioned to the cameraman to begin, letting him count her in. She clasped her fidgeting hands into her lap, took one more calming breathe and placed that Rachel Berry smile on her face; the one that spread to her eyes the first time Finn told her he loved her, when they won regionals for the first time, when she sang with Kurt at the Gershwin and realised they would always be in each other's lives, when Quinn had said they were kind of friends in the principals office all those years ago. The smile was still there. Sure there were a few lines around her eyes, surrounding her lips but that smile? In those eyes? It still shone with the same hopefulness that it had all those years ago back in Ohio.

"Good evening and welcome to the show, we have a very special guest with us tonight. A true Hollywood and Broadway legend, she has wowed the critics and audiences alike for decades and tonight she is here to talk to us about her latest venture as an author. Rachel Berry," the woman turns away from the camera and gives her a courteous nod, " it's a pleasure to have you here."

"Well it's a pleasure to be here Barbara, thanks for having me." She gave off the standard reply, still trying to calm her nerves somewhat, placing her hands to her leg to still the nervous bouncing. "I'm a little nervous to be honest with you" she added with a laugh.

"After all these years in the media are nerves still something you have to deal with?"

"Well, as you know, my whole media relationship has always been about my career. What film I was currently starring in, what role i was rumoured to be taking on Broadway, who designed the dress I was wearing. I've always kept my private life… well, private."

"So what changed?" asked Barbara, seemingly genuinely intrigued.

"It seems like its this big mystery in the industry about who I am away from a camera or an audience and today that changes. After all these years I've finally realised that I've got a story to tell. Not some gossip rag speculating about which leading man I'm with or if I was making outrageous backstage demands at a show, which I've never done by the way."

The two women share a laugh. Every powerful woman in the industry had been called a diva at some point in their lives, its just how the media game worked unfortunately. The woman reached across to the table sat between them and lifted a copy of the book to face the camera. It was a great cover, Rachel had demanded it. The photo was a black silhouette of a twenty year old Rachel on her knees, head bowed, exhausted with spotlights streaming down around her.

"It's a great cover, would you mind telling us the story behind it?"

"It was taken by a great friend of mine whilst I was on stage in central park at a college show for upcoming stars. I never give anything less than my best and that day was no different. I performed until my legs literally gave out. I gave my whole body and soul to that day and it made me famous." She smiled fondly at the memories of the madness that ensued in the following days. "Videos of that performance going viral, calls to NYADA asking who the hell this girl with the big nose and the bigger voice was and when could they book me. It was the day my career took off and I've never wanted to forget that moment when I was literally brought to my knees and how hard I had worked, what I had physically put my body through to get to where I am now. That was why THIS photo had to be on my book. My career had truly began that day, but this book is about how I got there, why I got there and most importantly who helped get me there."

"So you could say that this book is almost the making of a star?"

"Well I prefer to think of it as one of those E True Hollywood story type things. Before they were famous. Only mine is actually accurate and I can control the amount of embarrassing pictures in there. But yes, you could say that a large section of the book is devoted to that part of my life, because that is the time in my life that shaped who I am, who I have always been."

"So you could say that the events that you talk about in the first half of the book are essentially what makes Rachel Berry tick, what lies beneath the star?"

"Precisely Barbara. This is just Rachel Berry laid bare and that is what scares me. You've read the book, surely you understand my trepidation?" The woman leans forward, sensing the star's unease and places her hands over the slightly shaking ones in the brunettes lap.

"I certainly have and can I just say before we talk about any specifics what a genuinely beautiful book you've created. It's insightful and brutally honest. Truly a beautiful story that is at times heart-breaking and others hilarious. It's very brave of you to put this out into the world"

"Well thank you that means a lot," she lifts her gaze and blinks away a tear that had almost escaped. Inhaling deeply, she regains her composure in a flash. "Right! Where would you like to start?" She pauses for a moment, that playful glint in her eye before she adds "From the top?"

"Of course Miss Berry."

"It all begins with a beautiful blonde girl, every high school has one you know, who just wanted somebody to love her..."


	2. Chapter 2

Just a quick thanks for all the favourites etc. It means a lot that people actually want to read this! This chapter is very heavy on the dialogue, its how i prefer to write, so lots of back and forth between the characters here.

All italics represent the time when future Rachel is being interviewed and regular font is high school Rachel

**Chapter Two**

"You don't belong here Rachel, and you can't hate me for helping to send you on your way."

That was the moment Rachel had been waiting for, the raw emotion that Finn had told her she needed. And of course it would be Quinn Fabray that gave it to her, pulled those emotions from her once again. She felt the sharp sting of tears, the stabbing of Finn's betrayal coursing through her body. Looking back on that moment years later, after the drama between Rachel, Finn and the blonde was long forgotten, Rachel would always question Quinn's motives that day. Was she just the high school bitch who had the boy Rachel loved or was she truly a friend in disguise who didn't know any other way to stop Rachel throwing away her future?

"_So this popular girl was the stereotypical high school nemesis?" asked Barbara in a way that made Rachel think the woman had had one of her own many years before._

"_At the time that's precisely what I had thought. The boy I was in love with, who was my first true love, had chosen to be with someone else. I was a teenager getting her heart broken for the first time." reminisced the Broadway legend. _

"_And the fact that is was Quinn? Did that have any effect on your emotions at the time?"_

"_It didn't matter to me that he had chosen Quinn, it really didn't. I think it would have burned just as deeply with any other person because I was in love with Finn and he hadn't returned that love enough to choose me. Most teenagers have that, I guess?"_

"_I suppose, but not every teenager could have taken those emotions and turned them into something like you did, could they?"_

"_It did lead to me writing my first song. Well what I class as my first song. Apparently my ode to my headband has kind of a cult status at McKinley these days." The women share a knowing laugh, having seen the many youtube renditions. "The song helped our Glee Club beat the competition, but after all was said and done I had a song and a shattered heart. I didn't really feel like much of a winner that day."_

"_It must have been gratifying when that song and the album of the same name went to number one years later?" _

"_Oh definitely and I've always been grateful to Quinn for that, for pulling that out of me."_

"_So lets go back to this confrontation. In the book it seems to be one of a few major turning points in your relationship. Other than the song," the woman pauses and turns to camera "Get It Right, for the few of you viewers who may have lived under a rock for the past few decades." Another laugh resounds around the studio, putting the brunette even more at ease. "What else did you come away with from what you call in the book "the piano scene"?" _

"_Well it wasn't until weeks later that I actually remembered the rest of what Quinn had shouted through her tears at me as we stood by the piano. We were at our prom and for reasons I'll not get into right now, its in the book, we were in the middle of another confrontation in the bathroom."_

"_You two certainly had your fair share of verbal sparring matches back then."_

"_Well this one actually involved a slap as well as our verbal back and forth. Luckily I appreciated the dramatic effect in had on the moment. Quinn was absolutely beside herself with regret, of course, but I reassured her it was fine. That was the moment I remembered how she was essentially setting herself up to live her life as a Lima Loser. And if I thought anyone deserved to get out of that town more than me, it was Quinn Fabray. And me being Miss Rachel Berry, I just had to tell her so…"_

"You're a pretty girl Quinn, the prettiest girl I've ever met. But you're a lot more than that."

Quinn had immediately started spilling the tears she had been trying to hold in, cascades of hurt streaming down her beautiful face that Rachel couldn't bear to look at. Taking the tissue from Quinn's hand, she cautiously edged forward, closer to the other girl than she had ever been before and wiped the tears away.

"You don't know that Rachel. You're the one destined for the bright lights a world away from Lima, not me." the blonde muttered, not lifting her eyes from the ground. Fresh tears quickly replaced the ones that had been wiped away and Rachel stepped back.

"Quinn Fabray! There are more ways to get out of this town than to head to Broadway. You're a smart girl Quinn. You've made a few bad decisions, that's what teenagers are meant to do, to learn and grow into responsible young adults."

"That sounds like something a shrink would say."

"My shrink did tell me that. I make a point to note and memorise the most important details of our meetings for future reference. He always says he's the one meant to be taking notes and its almost like I'm reverse-shrinking him?" A small smile appears across pale lips before slipping away again, almost unnoticed by the brunette.

"You have had to grow up so fast and you deserve to get out of this town just as much as I do. You deserve bigger dreams than marrying a guy you don't really love and settling. You are worth so much more than that. You and I are worth way more than what Finn could offer."

"I don't deserve anything Rachel and I'm certainly not worth anything to anyone in this town." Rachel caught a glimpse of Quinn's eyes as the blonde pulled her head up, seeing the truth in them, that Quinn really believed these things she was saying about herself.

"Where is this coming from? You are a strong young woman Quinn," that earns her a scoff, " and that sounds more like something your father would say." She realises her mistake quickly. Rachel had never actually met Russell Fabray so when Quinn's questioning gaze shot to her she knew what was being asked of her. "Finn might have mentioned a few instances where your father was less than polite to you. For the record, I think Finn should have stood up for you and I told him so quite bluntly. Plus your mom kicked your dad out right?"

"She did" she said quietly, nodding. Drawing in a deep breathe, she continued. "He comes over to the house a lot, they're trying to work things out. I try to stay out of the house but I've got to shower and eat sometime, you know? Who would have thought a kid wouldn't want their parents to get back together right?" The dry laugh that follows the statement doesn't fool Rachel.

"He hasn't hit you again has he, because…" She is quickly cut off.

"WHAT? No, of course he hasn't. Why would you even think that?" Quinn is flustered, her eyes darting around the bathroom to check that no one has overheard even though she knows that the are the room's only occupants. "And what do you mean "again"? My father would never lay a hand on me."

"You don't have to lie to me Quinn." She reached out, taking one of the pale hands in her own, surprised when the blonde didn't pull away. "Finn saw him slap you Quinn, through the window when he was on his way to your house once. He said you just stood there, didn't react, like you were use to being hit. He also said you dad would call you worthless and a disappointment to the family."

The fight that had so quickly sprang up as Quinn defended her father's reputation sank away even more rapidly. "He still says all that stuff when my mom leaves the room. Only now he has a point. I am a disappointment to him. Pregnant at sixteen? Homeless?"

"You were homeless because he made you homeless Quinn. The only person who is a disappointment in that scenario is him. He should have stepped up and acted like your father. You should tell your mom how you're feeling, that he hasn't changed."

"If I tell my mom, she'll kick me out again. She chose his side when he kicked me out the first time, she'll do it again." The girl sounded defeated and broken and all Rachel could think to do was squeeze the hand she held in her own. "Its better if I just accept how things are until I can move into my own place. I just really need a place to stay right now. Its never going to be my home like it was before but at least I know I have a roof over my head every night. it's the best I can hope for right now Rachel."

Rachel was about to protest. Quite profusely, she would add. But Quinn finally looked up at her with those sad watery hazel eyes that pleaded with her to stop.

"I'm really tired Rachel, this day, month, hell the last year and a half has been awful and I really just want to go get into my bed and forget about my life for a few hours."

"Okay Quinn, okay. Would you like me to drive you maybe? Its not like either of has a date anymore." She asked hopefully, not at all happy with the idea of leaving Quinn and her thoughts alone tonight.

"That would be nice Berry, maybe you could stay and watch a movie?" She smiled slightly at Rachel's nod, making their way out of the bathroom. "Just no Funny Girl or Hello Dolly."

"Okay Quinn, you can choose" she replied, leading the blonde out into the car park.

"And maybe I'll talk to my mom tomorrow" she added as an afterthought, hoping Rachel would allow her to downplay this moment.

"How about West Side Story? I've always felt I was destined for the role of Maria" the brunette said as they approached her car, letting Quinn's comment go.

"Sure you are Berry. Just be quiet when we get to the house, just until we get to my room. I don't want to wake him if he's stayed over." Rachel nodded and let the subject go.

"_We spent the whole night watching musicals wrapped up together in Quinn's bed, Funny Girl included I might add, and when I left the next morning it was with a small hug and a whispered thanks in my ear and a "good luck" whispered back." _

"_So this one pivotal night really gave you an insight into her mindset at the time?"_

"_Exactly. I went home and did a lot of research on the matter. I was very prone to googling everything back then. Children from abusive backgrounds often find targets to lash out at outside of the family home. I had been that for Quinn and now that I knew the reasons behind it I only wanted to help more." _

_A sadness washed over Rachel's eyes as she remembered the times all those years ago when Quinn looked angry and lost, the times when bruises were explained away by Cheerio's routines and insults doled out to mask any truth._

"_So the two of you have had this giant emotional step in your friendship, how quickly did that bond solidify?"_

"_Well it didn't at the time. Quinn showed up to school on Monday with her hair pulled across her face and the same broken look she had wore in the bathroom at prom. I tried to talk to her, but she wouldn't even look me in the eyes. If Rachel Berry has a reputation for stubborness, I had nothing on this girl!"_

"_So regression on her part?"_

"_Certainly. Later that week, during dance rehearsals I caught the remnants of a black eye as her hair flew out during a spin and I knew exactly what had happened during her talk with her parents."_

"_There was no talk of a police charge against her father or getting out of the house?"_

"_Quinn wouldn't even admit she was hurt, let alone that it was her father that had done it. She put up her walls to everyone around her. Try as I might to help, I was shut out along with the rest of New Directions. Eventually, after our return from Nationals in New York, Brittany confessed to me that…"_

"_That's world renowned choreography and dancer Brittany Pierce, for those of you at home."_

"_Yes, of course. Retired from dancing now. She runs an exceptional dance academy in New York these days. She had confessed to me that Quinn had essentially had an emotional breakdown in our hotel room in New York, begging for happiness, someone to love her, to care."_

"_That must have been very hard to hear, considering what you knew about her home life."_

"_Yes it was, even more so that I had been too wrapped up in my whirlwind romance with Finn again to even notice. That only multiplied when Santana"_

"_Santana Lopez, blues singing legend for…"_

"_Those of you at home" Rachel re-interrupted with a smile. "Certainly were a talented bunch weren't we? Santana informed my that Russell had moved back into the family home shortly after prom and Quinn had been told to play ball or get the hell out." _

"_So here you have this girl that you so desperately want to help, who you know is in an emotionally and sometimes physically abusive environment shutting out your help. How do you overcome those barriers?"_

"_Well if there is one thing that the teenage Rachel Berry knew, it was how to persevere. I had the briefest flicker of what our relationship could be like on prom night and I was damn well going to fight for it. Fight for Quinn. Because no one ever had before, not once. And Quinn deserved someone to do that for her." She pauses briefly, catching her breath. "Everyone deserves that. Come senior year, I was resolutely set on the idea of being that person for her."_

"_And everything went smoothly from there, easy as that?" asked the woman chuckling, knowing fine well it hadn't._

"_Of course it didn't. This was real life, things couldn't just be resolved in a two hour movie or by us singing some song to each other."_

"_So no forty five minute emotional transformation such as on television." Barbara stated._

"_Absolutely not. Quinn disappeared that summer. She showed up for senior year with pink hair, piercings, a tattoo and a questionable hygiene routine. Thankfully, Rachel Berry thrives on a challenge. First stop? The cancer sticks. I had to protect that tremulous alto after all."_

"_We have to take a short break, join us after these advertisements for more from the entertainment legend Rachel Berry."_


	3. Chapter 3

Hi there and hello! Thank you for the feedback, i'm really glad you guys like the approach i'm taking with this story, just wanted to try something a little different i guess. This chapter is solely focused on future Rachel, i think its kind of important to see her frame of mind. Plus i like that i can write how she made her dreams come true

**CHAPTER THREE**

Rachel Berry didn't get nervous. Nerves were for amateurs who were unsure of themselves and Rachel Berry had been sure of herself and her abilities since the age of five. That was just who she was. Put her on a stage in front of thousands of people and millions more on television and she could take a breath and transform into whoever she needed to be. Even after forty years in the business; the first Tony award, the years in her thirties when people wrote her off, the high of her fortieth birthday when she proved them all wrong with another Grammy and a standing ovation- winning performance, through all of the ups and downs all it ever took was that one breath and she was ready. Not today.

Rachel stood at the crafts table picking at what she was assured were all vegan-friendly snacks. Most of it had a grainy texture that she could only assume resembled cardboard but picking her way through to find what she deemed edible was not only a skill she had become talented at over the years, but also gave her trembling hands an outlet for their nerves energy.

Nerves. Again, there was that word. There was no mask to slip over her features, no character to crawl inside of and hide. She was Rachel Berry playing Rachel Berry. Well, not playing. _Being_ Rachel Berry. It had been so long since she had been expected to just be herself in front of a camera that the concept seemed completely foreign to her. Hence, nerves. One deep breath had turned into three into eight into losing count. Leaning into the table and rolling her head back, Rachel finally exhaled, dropped her shoulders, stretched them back. She found comfort in the normality of her pre-concert routine of stretches. Her body was getting old, tired and she knew it, but doing these things that she had always done tricked her mind a little. She could remember standing behind the curtains, listening to Quinn and Sam sing the opening of 'Time of my life' doing these stretches. Just waiting. For the moment when the curtain would rise to the rest of the Glee club singing and dancing backup. She could picture it like it had happened last week; The radiance of Quinn's smile as she spun into Sam, Mercedes hitting that high note and Rachel herself beaming at Quinn getting her moment to shine and a little surprise at her complete lack of jealousy as she was pushed to the background to make room for her team to shine. And boy had Quinn shone. Radiated. Glowed, but not in a pregnant way, thank God. That was the first time you had looked at her and just thought 'wow'. Nothing could touch her then, she was ethereal and you were just happy to be on that stage with her, in her orbit.

"Miss Berry? How are you holding up? It can be intense in this setting, right?" asked her interviewer, reaching over to grab some of the cardboard-esque snacks.

"Oh yes, just reminiscing about the old days. I would stay away from that section of the table if I were you," she adds, pointing to the area that Barbara had just reached for. The woman immediately retracts her hands and reaches for the safer option of sliced fruit after Rachel's approving nod.

"And you should call me Rachel. It seems strange for you to call me Miss Berry after you've read my book. Oh God, you did read it didn't you? I mean I know sometimes that interviewers just read a synopsis and…"

"Normally yes, I would just get an overview but not with you. I know I have to say it for the cameras to all of my guests, but I am actually a fan of yours. I remember seeing you in this little off-Broadway play that I can't even recall the name of now. Many years ago, before you 'made it' as they say. You had to have been twenty maybe? You had this awful red wig on and were playing an alien waitress I think."

"Oh I'm so sorry you had to sit through that! _The Diner From Outer-Space. _That was truly a terrible play. We were all so convinced that we would get this huge cult following like _Rocky Horror _but it was just terrible." she laughed at the starry eyed version of herself all those years ago, excited about her first role. "I hope you got to see one of my better plays sometimes."

"My husband always makes sure to book tickets to your latest show whenever we travel to New York. Its not too often these days, but then again you haven't been on the stage as much as you use to be." The woman almost seems sad for you, her eyebrows knitting above her kind blue eyes.

"Its hard work writing a book, especially one as," she pauses, searching for the exact word she needed. Rachel would never settle for saying something that didn't truly reflect her feelings at that point.

"Intimate?" at Rachel's nod she continues. "I can't imagine how hard those last few chapters were to write for you."

"You should try living them," the brunette adds with a wry laugh, picking at the plate of apple in her hands, dropping her eyes away from the other woman for the first time since she approached the table.

"Oh that's not what I meant at all, I just…" she tries to get out before Rachel cuts her off.

"I know. Its just a major turning point in my life. My own epic love story as people say. It was a life time ago but the memories are still so clear and I guess I'm still coming to terms with sharing that side of me." She smiles up through watery eyes at the suddenly-unsure woman in front of her.

"I remember being eighteen, trying to figure out the rest of my life and just being overwhelmed. High school can be a challenging enough environment without realising you're in love with your arch-nemesis I suppose? Especially when that person is a girl too."

"It was a different world back then. The equality of today was a distant dream that I hoped we would reach one day. Trying to plan the rest of my life at the time was, demanding, I guess. With college, Finn's proposal and then Quinn… She once told me that I couldn't know who I would be or who I would want once I got out of Lima, that women were finding themselves in their thirties and I shouldn't throw my dreams away on a high school romance that wouldn't stand the test of time and distance."

Barbara failed to smother her chuckle, adding "Little did she know, hmmm?"

"Well she was talking about Finn at the time, not herself. She was right about him, but she couldn't have been anymore wrong about a high school love lasting the years after graduation. I mean, look at me - I'm an old woman smiling like a school girl with a crush just talking about her."

"TEN MINUTES PEOPLE!" bellows across the studio, shocking you out of your memories.

"I guess that's my cue to have my makeup touched up. It takes a little longer that it use to, you know." Barbara joined her in a smile

"I've got a few years on you Miss Berr." She pauses at the patented Rachel Berry glare. "Sorry, Rachel. I'll see you back in the hot seat in ten."

"You sure will once I get these old lady lines covered up." You appreciate the reassuring hand the woman places on your shoulder as she turns to leave.

"Thank you," you add. "For being kind to me today. It means a lot to me. And Quinn."

"No, thank you Rachel. Its not every day that a love story like this is told. It's very brave of you, after all of these years hiding it while you are in the limelight. You are just, well you're just…" she pauses, taking a calming breath and you see her eyes glistening. "You are a very brave woman Rachel."

Rachel see's her hand come up to swipe at her eyes as she walks away and it calms the singer down in a strange way. It isn't too often she can say that an interviewer has her back in this business.

"FIVE MINUTES PEOPLE!"

Rachel rushes over to her makeup chair, she wasn't joking about those old lady line and Rachel Berry will never look less than perfect for the camera.


End file.
